Am I Suicidal? (Jessie and Helsing)

He sighed and wondered what he had done wrong. He wasnt good with people and didnt tihnk about what he said could hurt people. Usually, he wasnt one to care.

"Whats wrong Jess...? You know i dont mean things to sound as horrible as i say them. I was kididng. Thats just the way i am..."

"Dont drink animal blood eh..? Hmm.. well, i guess im gonna do something else completely retarded now.." He took out a cup and a knife and cut across his arm, letting blood gather in the cup before bandaging the wound.

"Here, fresh, warm.. its like im giivng you a very disturbing cup of hot coco right now.."

He put his hand on her shoulder to show he was sorry, even if he couldnt quite bring himself to say the words.
"Dont be upset Jess. You'll be rid of me soon enough kid."

Jessie turned to Helsing and smiled softly, she stood up in the water and kicked her legs around a bit, paddling in the calm waters. Nodding Jessie knew that was him apologising and that was good enough for her, so she bounded out of the water and sat next to him again.

"I know you don't Helsing, I know, I was just trying to be nice to you that's all, i just wanted for you to see the way that I see you."

Shrugging her shoulders Jessie shook her head and was about to speak when she saw the knife and cup:

"W-what are you doing? I meant I would never tell any-"

She was cut short by a gasp and Jessie watched as Helsing cut his arm and let it pour into a cup for her, as soon as hd had done Jessie looked at his arm with worry in her eyes, not affected by the blood much at all.

"Helsing, you didn't have to...you said you wouldn't let me, you're a funny one."

Taking the cup she sipped the blood softly and her small fangs extended, not scary at all but rather cute, looking up at Helsing Jessie beamed happily.

"I don't want to be rid of you Helsing...I'll miss you."

He was relieved to see she wasnt as upset now.
"I guess im just not used to nice" He shrugged. "And sorry kid, im a very closed minded cynic, my view of the world isnt changed easily. The view of myself is even harder to change."

"Haha, well a bit late for that now. I could have hunted something down for you but this is quicker i guess. Haha.. i know.. The vodka must be making me act weirder than usual.. You'll have a taste for me now though so i'll have to watch myself" He joked.

Jessie almost looked sweet, in a distrubed way. You'd think he'd be more bothered about watching someone drink his blood but he wasnt.

"Miss me..? Why ever so..? And who knows.. follow a line of destruction and that usually leads to me.."

Jessie glanced up at Helsing and smiled shyly, she wanted to keep talking about this but decided that it probably wasnt a good idea the only thing she wanted to say about it was something she hoped wouldn't annoy him, but would make then both think about what had happened here tonight.

"Well I hope I've been able to change your mind just a little bit, that not all vampires are as bad as we seem, just as all hunters aren't."

Smiling happily she sipped at the blood again, wanting to keep it, and to save it, blood had powerful memories and Jessie didn't want to use up all of it, just in case she never saw Helsing again. Jessie had a sudden idea and grinned:

"I've got an idea! Oh no wait...you won't like it...sorry just ignore me."

Jessie laughed happily at Helsing and hugged his arm softly:

"Because your so nice, and I'll be sad to never see you again. I may just do that, hope I follow the right path of destruction though."

"So far Jess, you and i are the only exception, becuase others like us are a lot worse. In all honesty, i felt bad about killing you becuase you're only a kid. Other hunters dont have a qualm about that."

He rolled his eyes with a sigh and gave a small laugh. "Go oon.. whats this idea of yours then..?"

"Me? Nice? Haha.. No, im not a nice guy... Im just softened up by vodka. Well kid, since you've drank my blood, you may kind of be pulled to me you know? If not, here."
He snapped a wooden pendent in half.
"Each half is polarised to find the other. It'll be liek a compass and will guide you in the right direction. Might stop a few of the lower hunters from killing you too if they think you're on our side or something."

Jessie listened to what Helsing had to say and she nodded, secretly she knew that he was telling the truth all of the other hunters probably would have killed her without a hesitation so she was lucky that she found Helsing not another one.

"I know...and I'm thankful for that, but seriously I'm 88 I'm older than you!!"

Huffing in a jokey way Jessie smiled softly again and took the pendant that Helsing held out to her, she placed it on a chain with two crystal balls both empty at the moment.

"Thank you! This means a lot to me, I'd hug you but, you don't look like a hugger so...my idea? Here...watch this."

Jessie took one of the beads off the necklace and clicked the small silver clasp at the top of it, which opened up the bead, smiling Jessie dipped a drop of Helsings blood into it and closed it back up so it glowed red. Then she took the other one off and bot down hard on her wrist so that her blood fell into the other pearl and she gave it to Helsing.

"If you have this, you can always find me, and you can talk to me to I'm sure, of anything else, keep it to remind yourself of me even if you never use it."

He laughed and ruffled her hair again. "Well you dont look it."

He sighed with a smile and gave her a quick hug with both arms.
"There. Happy now?" He alughed and watched the balls. He didnt tihnk there were many items like that left in the world.

"Oh cool.." He took the bead carefully and put it in his inside jacket pocket. "Jess, i dont think im likely to forget you any time soon even if i tried." He smiled.

He leant back and stretched against one of the boulders."So Jess... we've got a few hours to kill.. what do you wan to talk about?"

Jessie smiled wryly and poked Helsings side with a finger, she was glad that he had seemed to finally accept that she wasn't actually a kid, she was just in the mindset of one, which okay made her pretty kid like but still...

"Wow, yes, very happy thank you Helsing, you're quite the softie aren't you?"

She smiled and realised just how much that he had done so too in the past few minutes and Jessie kept this to herself, she didn't want him to stop which he may just do if she pulled him up on it. Looking at the pendant he had given her Jessie traced the lines on it and smiled to herself.

"Is that because we've had such an awesome time together? Or because I've reinforced that vampires are blood thirsty creatures who want to eat you as soon as look at you?"

Jessie bore her tiny baby fangs and hissed jokily. Laying down next to Helsing she smiled and said:

"How about we play a game? Would you rather? Ever played that?"

"Ow" He laughed in a joke, although really she had just pressed an old wound which was still sore, but he wasnt bothered.

He gave her a noogie and ruffled her hair again. "Hey! Im not a softie" He laughed. "Im drunk on vodka, and thats the story you give if anyone asks. I have a rep of a ruthless cold bastard to uphold you know."

"Haha, both" He joked, playfully nudging her in the arm.

"Erm... i was never really one for games, but we'll play if you ant, and im sure you can clue me in on the rules as we go along."

Jessie gasped and let her hands hover around the place where she had poked and the look of most profound apology on her face, she hadn't meant to hurt him, did she use too much of her strength? She didn't think so but maybe it was possible right?

"I'm sorry Helsing! I didn't mean to poke hard!!!"

She nodded her head and pretended to be scared of Helsing, backing away slightly before returning to her original spot:

"I only escaped because I crawled on my belly and regenerated off the blood of rats for 3 months."

Jessie nodded seriously before grinning:

"Okay then! Basically you say two things and the person has to pick what they would rather do, so here's my question to you, would you rather let me braid your hair or wear your awesome hat? And you have to pick one! Then you ask me and it goes on."

"No no, its alright you didnt. A werewolf caught me with its claws in that same place last week is all."
He threw her a reassuring smile to show she hadnt done anything and that he was fine.

He laughed and clapped his hands. "You're a good little actress there Jessie."

"Ooooh... kkk..." He wasnt sure he'd be much good at this game... He grinned at her and gave a small laugh. Usually he didnt remove his hat for anybody but he took it off and plopped it on her head. It was comical how it was too big for her, and it had gone from looking awesome on him to adorable on her.
"Erm... would you rather me throw you in the lake or tickle you into oblivian..?"

Jessie bit her lip and looked at the spot where the wound is and for a moment she wished that he would be a little more careful about what he did, before realising that Helsing was a hunter and could never be safe, no matter how careful.

"Oh no, I hope it heals up soon, and the one you got tonight, is it still sore?"

Nodding her head Jessie bobbed where she sat to imitate bowing and she grinned, supressing a laugh as she was still 'acting' the great actress she was:

"Thank you thank you I'll be here all week."

As the hat was plopped over her head Jessie stuck out her hands to feel her way around as she couldn't see anything, accidentally she bumped into Helding but what part of him she didnt know, tipping the hat up she smiled softly.

"Who turned out the lights?! And tickled, that way all my things don't get wet, that wouldn't be good. Would you rather wear an I heart vampire tshirt for a day, or a big pink dress?"

"Fmeh, it will. And no not really. I won't real feel much of anything until the vodka wears off"
He'd grown accustomed to pain as part of his job so his injuries never really bothered him. He was a tough git.

He laughed and gave her a mini round of applause.
"I didn't think Vamps could be comedians"

He chuckled as she bumped into his back. She really was just like a big adorable kid.
"Tickled eh?" He grinned and launched at her tickling her sides and neck and back.

"Pink dress every time. I've got the legs for it." He joked. "Would you rather... erm..." He wasn't good at this at all... "meet a load of hunters or werewolves?"

Jessie smiled at Helsing, it was true, he was tough and she didn't really know what to do since she couldn't help so she just decided to worry to herself about him, not that she could do much if he needed her help anyway.

"I'm glad that it doesn't hurt, id feel bad if it did."

She blushed a bit, face palingenesis with it and she bobbed again with the applause that he gave her.

" You learn something new every day,"

Jessie yelped and started to laugh uncontrollably kicking her legs to try and get away from Helsing all the while squeaking 'Nooooo!' 'Mercy!!!' until she dissolved into silent laughter.

"I could sort you out with a pink dress, what about an I heart Jessie tshirt, would you wear that?"

Thinking about it for a moment she decided "Werewolves, not all of them are mean and at least I'd have a chance right? If they were hunters I'd be sooooo dead. Would you rather be blind or be deaf?"

"Nah don't let yourself feel bad for me Jess. You've got yourself to worry about. I've survived worse attacks than this believe me. I've been jumped by gangs and packs and still manage to make it out alive"

He laughed and pushed her playfully. "Hey that's my bit"

"Never!" He laughed at her pleas and squeals and didn't relented in tickling her for a good minute.

"Only if you wore a Helsing fan club jacket" He joked.

"Haha, well don't let other vampires hear you pick that option. Erm... Blind... I've seen enough of the world and hearing can be a better tool than sight. When hunting in pitch black with no night vision goggles, I have to rely on hearing and gutt feeling alone anyway. Ok, same sort of lines, would you rather be unable to speak or unable to walk?"

Jessie smiled and nodded her head she Southend let Helsing know that she was feeling bad for him, she would just keep it on the inside but thee was something about him which made her think that he may not like being worried after all too much.

"Wow Helsing, you're so brave..."

She muttered, wishing that she herself could be that brave.

"Gahhhhhh!!!"

Jessie cried as he kept on tickling her and as he eventually stopped she gasped for the air she didn't need and she bit her lip scowling playfully at him, folding her arms across her chest and hmpf-ing.

"Id wear one of those, if there was one to be worn, but for now ill stick to your wicked awesome hat."

Thinking hard for a moment Jessie came to a conclusion: "I would rather not speak, because you need to walk to run and dance and all that stuff and there's always sign language and writing stuff down instead of speech. Would you rather eat only cheese or only dry crackers for the rest of your life?"

He couldnt understand why she seemed so worried. She didnt need to worry about him. He could take care of himself; he'd had to. But he didnt want pity. If anytihng though, he felt orry for her becuase it seemed unfair she had to be what she was when she seemed to sweet for the lifestyle.

"Thanks, but some might use the world insane instead. I think you're quite brave to be out in the world alone like you are and to talk to big scary guys like me. You should be proud of yourself."
He ruffled her hair and smiled at her.

He laughed at the antics out of her. "See, this is what makes it hard for me to not see you as a kid."

"Haha, maybe i'll get one made for you. And you do know that at some point you're gonna have to give me my hat back right?"

"Sensible answer, i'd have probably chosen the same thing. Erm.. random.. er cheese i guess becuase their more protein and flavour and variety then there is in crackers. Ok, im curious as to what would be worse for a vampire. Would you rather go a month without being able to sleep, or a week without any blood?"

Jessie looked at Helsing with a confused expression, her? Brave? That wasn't possible was it? Wasn't she left because she was the very opposite of brave? Biting her lip she smiled softly up at him and played with her fingers some more trying to not get embarrassed.

"No offense Helsing, but you're not so scary when you've been drinking vodka, and thank you, but I'm not normally described as brave."

Pouting Jessie shook her head and stamped her foot hard on the ground: "I'm a teenager, I throw moods with the best of them and my hormones are far from controlled...awwwwwwww....do I have to give it back?"

Then smirking she took it off her head and shoved it right down her top where he couldn't get it, pulling her Tongue Jessie laughed light heartedly, for a hunter, Helsing didn't know much about vampires did he?

"Easy peasy, a month without sleep, we technically don't need sleep you know, any vampire you see sleeping is more often just planning an attack on you or needs lots of energy. So, would you rather be bitten by a vampire or a werewolf?"

"Haha, wait til i sober up kid. Well maybe you're braver than you think."

He laughed at her little diva antics. "Haha, oh dear, teenage girls are worse. And yes, yes you do." He raised and eyebrow at her when she jid it down her top. "Ahh come on.. dont do that... I WILL get that hat back by any means necessary if i have to..."
He lunged and tickled her again.

"Ah right. I should have guessed really. Ive known a werewolf to go 3 weeks without food or sleep. I just figured that the vampires further down the ranks might need to sleep more to conserve their energy. I dont tend to ask questions usally Jess, i just tend to shoot." He looked out over the lake and replied seriously. "Neither. I'd rather die. And if i got bitten, i think i'd kill myself. Being a human in this world is tough, but i wouldnt want to change what i am."

Jessie pulled her tongue out at Helsing and hugged her arms to her chest as he started to tickle her, giggling she ran off before he could make her immobile and she Kay down on her tummy the other side of the fire looking intently at Helsing.

"Wow...that's a long time for something to go without food and sleep..."

Biting her lip Jessie hugged herself and moved her gaze from Helsing, how could he hate a species he didn't even fully understand?

"I see. H-helsing you know, if I were to bite you. Which I'm not!!! But if a vampire did bite you...it doesn't turn you...all the fangs hold is a special sort of chemical that makes the biting feel good not hurt, but we choose if we use that or not."

Jessie hung her head and sighed softly, hugging her knees to her chest.

"Would you rather have met me, or not met me?"

Raoul growled jokily in defeat.
"Clever tactic.. well played.. but i still want my hat back before we part ways."

"Yea it is i guess. A lot of them are tough nuts to crack."

He knew he'd probably said something to upset her again, but he wasnt going to change his opinions. He didnt want to understand any other race. He didnt really want to get to know anyone because it only made his job harder.
"I know it doesnt turn a person all the time, its like how being clawed by a werewolf doesnt always transform a person, but i still wouldnt like either option. Im human, and i want to stay that way."

"Would you rather keep playing, talk about something else, or just enjoy the peace and quiet for a while?"

He sighed and sat beside her with his hand on her shoulder.
"Well i dont know if i would have preferred to meet you some other way, but so far, no, i dont think i regret meeting you Jess. I bet you wish you hadnt have met me but hey.. you never know who or what life will throw in your path."

Jessie pouted, she didn't want to give him back his hat, she wanted to keep it as a sort of momento of their time together, but she supposed that she was going to have to give it back, after all, people would talk if they saw her with Helsings hat.

"You're so mean Helsing! I'll make my own."

Humph-ing jokily Jessie tried to block out his answer to her other question and focus on how nice he had been, she wasn't thinking of doing anything like that to him but Jessie was hurt that he thought she was so...that she was practically vermin.

"I understand that, I'm not asking you to change your ideas. I was just telling you that's all."

Jessie shrugged her shoulders, looking out over the lake she dipped her feet in again, her shoes by the fire.

"I'm going for a swim, you sleep if you want Helsing."

Not really clocking on that Helsing would be bothered by it Jessie pulled her top off over her head and tugged at her jeans, laying them on a pile next to her shoes, true they weren't the sexiest of underwear but the little cupcakes on them were cute. At least Jessie thought so.

"Haha, I may be mean, but that's sort of the point, and you can guilt trip me all you like but I can't let you keep my hat I'm afraid"

Helsing realised he may have been upsetting the girl, but he didn't concern himself with other peoples feelings because it just made his life more difficult. He was crap with people. That's why he was thankful sometimes that he lived alone and didn't have a family to worry about.
"Good, because I don't plan to." He sighed. "Look, Jess, don't let everything people say get to you alright?"

"I might just have a sleep actually, but that doesn't mean I won't still be keeping my eye on you" He winked to show he was trying to have a joke. He hugged his crossbow to his chest and lay back and nearly had a heart attack.
"Whoa whoa whoa! Do you always strip off in front of men?! Give me some warning next time kid"
He looked away from her. He wasn't bashful or anything, he just knew it wasn't appropriate.

"Oh Jessie! Jessie be careful! Don't swim too far out in case you get your foot caught or something pulls you down!"
He didn't know why he was acting like an overprotective dad.

Jessie looked at Helsing a little confused and she shook her head a little, if he was going to sleep that meant she had some time on her own and as well as being alert for dangers she also had Helsing to look out for while he was vulnerable...if indeed he ever was.

"Okay Helsing, you sleep, I'll be here to look over you."

Smiling softly Jessie shrugged her shoulders and looked even more confused:

"Not normally no, but you don't like me like that, so it's okay right? Right."

Answering her own question Jessie looked back at Helsing with a look of surprise on her face, not because he should be asleep but because he was telling her to be careful, making her smile even wider Jessie waved his concerns away and called out:

"Yes DAD."

Plunging into the water Jessie didn't even gasp and began to swim around the shallow area of the waters so that Helsing was near enough if he needed her, or vice versa.

"I don't need looking after kid...I've managed fine for 18 years" He stretched and hoped he hadn't sounded too cold.

"No its not ok! You don't strip in from of someone Jess! Jesus Christ!" He still made sure to avert his eyes.

Boy that word was weird to him...'dad'... It was never a label that would fit him...
"I mean it, be careful."

He relaxed a little when he saw she wasn't straying too far out into the lake. He didn't know why he felt protective over the enemy. He just did. Too much vodka maybe. He swiped his hat back from her clothes pile and shoved it in his jacket before closing his eyes.

He suddenly had a streak of wickedness run through him. While she wasn't looking he slipped away and hid in the shubbery on another side of the lake. He removed his boots, coat and shirt and snuck quietly into the water and slowly headed towards her. The water was so dark she wouldn't see him. He jolted up and grabbed her arms.
"Rah!" He laughed and disappeared under the water again.